Tuesday, December 8, 2009

An end to look forward for??

Just a few more seconds to freedom, just a few more minor ticks from the clock until the end of an experience, a begining so near -just within grasp- but yet so far...

The moment all form-5-mers been waiting for. THE END OF SPM.

"But is this an end worth looking forward to?" She silently asks herself in her final minutes in the examination hall as she looks out of the window towards the dark gray rainy sky. The voices of her classmates that finished their paper and left early could be heard as clearly as a bell. She could leave the hall and touch freedom early herself, but instead, she resists temptation and chooses to stay for the last remaining minutes.

She went deep in thought as the rain drops fell to the ground,
"What now?" She asks herself as she leans on her table to face towards the open window. Just months ago she had made up her mind about her future career. About the plans that she might endure after the challenges that she faced. However, now, all that's planed doesn't look convincing at all, in fact, difficult and almost impossible -just like a child's fantasy.

"Peperiksaan telah tamat. Calon dikehendaki untuk berhenti menulis. Sila ikatkan kertas jawapan serta helaian tambahan yang digunakan bersama-sama. Kertas peperiksaan akan dikutip sekarang." The sound of the examiners voice startled her, pushing her away from her day dream. She looks around the examination hall and counted the remaining who have chosen to stay until the very last minute just like her. Only 11 students including her, the other 14 have apparently chosen an early freedom. She looks at her best friend who is looking back at her and both smiled. Showing happiness from their long -hard earned- freedom.

"Calon boleh beredar sekarang." as these words came out of the examiners mouth, the remaining students eagerly stood up, cleared their table and walked out of the class room. Their joy expressed by cheers and hugs. Many said their goodbyes with mixed emotions and many made arrangements for their ultimate shopping spree. Many talked about the joy that the end of school life would bring. But none actually saw the big picture. None bothered to think of the bigger effort that they have to put in order to go on in life. She didn't bother talking to most of them except replying their simple goodbyes. She took her time walking out of the school taking in and looking at monuments that was filled with memories -her memories- during her life there as a student. At the gate she turned back to look at the ugly bright orange coloured building for her final time as a high school student and when finally satisfied, she walked off. Leaving the life she lived and known for the past 11 years of her life. Looking forward towards the new beginnings she will have and not the ends.

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